E210/Business and Professional Writing, Dr. Michael O'Conner

Exercises:

These brief exercises are worth 10 points each. Write your answers in a word document. Save the first document in this format: ex1xxx.doc (ex1 = exercise one, xxx = your three initials). Email the document to the professor on the due date as an attachment.

Exercise One, Answer Exercise 2.10 (page 51) in Chapter 2, turn in via email

Exercise Two, Answer Exercise 3.7 (page 76) in Chapter 3, turn in via email

Exercise Three, Answer Exercise 4.12 (page 105) in Chapter 4, turn in via email

Exercise Four, Answer Exercise 5.8 (page 138) in Chapter 5, turn in via email

Exercise Five: rewrite two sections below, turn in via email

(1)  There has been a tardiness on the part of supervisors in the forwarding of reports to the shipping department.  This forestalls the expeditious transportation of units to our assembly plant.  And this, in turn, means it's impossible to effectuate delivery of finished products on the dates customers anticipate.

Therefore, supervisors are enjoined to make reports of completed units to the shipping department with promptitude.

(2)  We are in receipt of your letter complaining about the hours our company is open to serve the public and pointing out how inconvenient 9 to 5 proves to be for an employed individual who is not free during this time interval.

It is recognized that, by your bringing this matter to our attention, you are disclosing a problem that not only you but also a number of our other customers may have.  Consequently, the hours our company is open for business will receive careful study and review.

In the meanwhile, if you will please give our service department a call, then a special appointment will be arranged for you, at which time your defective typewriter will be picked up for repair.
 

Read the following paragraph which accompanies a life insurance contract:
 

This contract may, within ten days after receipt by the Owner, be returned by delivering it or mailing it to the Company or the agent through whom it was purchased.  Immediately, upon receipt by the Company, this Contract shall be deemed void from the beginning.  The Purchase Payments allocated to the General Account plus the Separate Account Contract Value next computed following receipt of this Contract by the Company, shall then be returned to the Owner within ten days after receipt.

When you receive your contract, you have ten calendar days to accept or reject it.  If you decide to reject the contract, mail it to the company or deliver it to your agent within ten calendar days from the date you received the contract.

After receiving your rejected contract, the company will void it and return your initial payment within ten calendar days.

Reader-oriented style follows four main guidelines:

•  Uses the “real subject” or actor as the grammatical subject of the sentence.
•  Puts the action in verbs, not nouns.
•  Uses active voice constructions.
•  Uses reader-oriented words.

Not: Our expectation was to begin the new semester immediately.
But: We expected to begin the new semester immediately.

Put action in verbs:
Not: The police were conducting an investigation of the robbery that occurred this morning.
But: The police are investigating the robbery that occurred this morning.

Not: Her discovery of the missing coins happened on Friday while she was cleaning the antique vase.
But: She discovered the missing coins on Friday while cleaning the antique vase.

Use active voice constructions

Not: The proper procedures for presenting a guest’s check must be learned by the new staff.
But: The new staff must learn the proper procedures for presenting a guest’s check.

Not: Employee purchases must be paid for within ninety days or in six payroll deductions in all cases.
But: All employees must pay for their purchases within ninety days or in six payroll deductions.

Use reader-oriented words

Language should be specific and gender-neutral.

Not: A computer in the lab is not working correctly.
But: The monitor on computer 55 in the lab is blinking on and off when students use the graphics software package.

Not: Each student should bring his book to class.
But: All students should bring their books to class.
 

Clarity is the goal.  In general, avoid empty/inflated/uncommon words, and strive for positive, audience-centered language (even when giving bad news).